Season's Greetings to all, it's been a great year, and I'm sorry that this week was so hectic I am again late in writing what is supposed to be a Friday feature blog. But good things are worthy of any wait, so I hope you will all forgive.
I will also do my best to update my other regular blog early in the week. As you can tell, I've been swamped.
First question comes from the comment section of last weeks blog, Whitney asks:
I recently got back with my boyfriend, we had been split up for about 4 maybe 5 months, and throughout the whole time I was being stubborn saying it didn't work when I knew inside I was missing something. Now as Christmas looms, I want to do something amazingly special for him, to show him how much I wish I didn't waste that time with him. Any ideas?
Well Whitney, I love a true love story, and this is totally great. Congratulations, it's great to hear the happiness in your question.
First, I agree, do something amazing. And there is so many things you can do to amazing him, and don't stop at one, show him how amazing your feelings are for him over and over again. I'd start with doing something that shows how important the time wasted was, and to reflect how much you know your stubbornness cost the two of you. Dedicate sometime to just cuddle and talk and listen, and catch up. And if he's not a talker, do something else that he totally loves to do and take a firm interest in that activity.
And it seems that you want this to be a long-term success project, so show a desire to fix whatever the problem was in the first place, and build a happier and healthier bond than in the past.
And thirdly, if you were wrong, don't be afraid to say I'm sorry. I think it's important to hear that when two people go through a painful time.
Congrats again.
Louise asks about Christmas:
What can you do to give your kids a perfect Christmas? I can buy presents to spoil them, but I'd like to add to their understanding of what Christmas is. Help?
I agree totally with you Louise, Christmas has become too much of a commercialized holiday, where gifts become far too important, and the actual spirit of Christmas is lost. The sad thing about it though, if you subject your children to things symbolic of true Christmas spirit, such as volunteering at a homeless shelter, there is a very real chance they will consider some form of punishment. And that would be both sad yet funny.
I'd suggest give the gifts that you normally would, and spend a little extra time focusing on the understanding of the spirit of Christmas. That would be a great way to give more of a gift to your children.
Willie asks about the economic crisis and the automobile industry:
Irene you are a smart cookie, what is the best course of action with this bail out of the auto manufacturing sector?
Well Willie, the economy can't afford to lose those jobs, so it's a no brainer that the Federal Government in both the US and Canada have to take big action.
The economy as a whole is a major concern, and about 6 weeks ago I boldly predicted a major shift was going to happen in the next 6 months thanks to the Obama election win in the US.
Here's hoping I was right.
To all, I'm going home to Toronto this week for the holidays, and look so forward to it. I will do my best to catch up on blogs. Happy Holidays.
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Better Late than Never-- A perfect description for advice
My apologies for not writing a blog this week. Much like so many I've talked to, I've been suffering from a cold, and had no energy level whats0ever. I didn't miss a single hour of work, but I definitely didn't do much else.
One of my very best friends, Mike Davidson of Winnipeg questions:
Put yourself into an impossible work environment where you feel you are doing your best to succeed and are getting held back. Put me in that situation, where I'm aggressive in my dis-content. What advice can you give me?
My Italian demeanor, is much like your demeanor, when I feel I'm getting wronged, held back, not treated properly in the workplace, or not being promoted on my abilities, I am very direct in taking it up with my superiors. It has been both a key in my successes and downfalls, but it helped define exactly who I am professionally. I doubt I'm as colourful at it as you are, and I'd absolutely love to be a fly on the wall when you took up a matter with a boss you felt was not taking your best interests into account.
My advice. In the entertainment business, you've found yourself being the boss all too often with guys who had much larger egos than even you, correct? How did you feel as a boss when they came to you to ask for more money, complain about their treatment, or attempt to better position themselves within your workplace?
You are in the great position to see it from both sides, and consider that when making your approach. If it's not fixable, and you must exit, you are the smartest and most capable person of creating his own success, so you'll do just fine.
To the rest of you who just read that advice, sorry I was so specific knowing the person asking as I did. But its useful to anyone who is in an unhappy place professionally, there is two sides to the equation. Put yourself in your bosses shoes, very rarely is a boss trying to sabotage his company to make you unhappy.
Shandra asks:
What are the greatest challenges a woman like you encounters on a daily basis?
Shandra, I write this as I laugh, because you have made me write an answer that will make me look like a complete egotistical idiot. My greatest challenge every day, is dressing myself. I don't like to ever wear the same combination twice. So every night before I go to bed I do some figuring of what top I'm going to wear, and in the morning decide my lower half. I've made it a habit to cycle through clothing every 2-3 months to ensure I don't ever get seen wearing the same thing twice.
My job is not a challenge at all, it's a rush, and I can do it in my sleep, but it doesn't challenge me at all. I hope that if my co-workers read this, they are happy with my professional performance, otherwise I will have just offended them to no end.
I currently find it a minor challenge adjusting to life in Vancouver. But my GPS helps a great deal, and I'm even starting to meet a friend or two.
Domo, a sports-fan inquires:
If you were named General Manager of the 2010 Olympic Team Canada hockey program, who would be your roster?
Domo, I won't be. And without researching, I will do my best not to forget anybody, or put a foreign player on my list by mistake.
In goal- Roberto Luongo, Martin Brodeur, Carey Price
Defense- Chris Pronger, Scott Neidermayer (assuming he's still playing), Dion Phaneuf, Shae Webber, Dan Boyle, Ed Joviniski.
Forwards- Jarome Iginla, Sidney Crosby, Vincent Lecavalier, Dany Heatley, Shane Doan, Jordan Toews...
This is harder than I thought. Can I just trust Steve Yzerman to do a good job?
Hope it was as good for you the reader as it was for me the writer.
One of my very best friends, Mike Davidson of Winnipeg questions:
Put yourself into an impossible work environment where you feel you are doing your best to succeed and are getting held back. Put me in that situation, where I'm aggressive in my dis-content. What advice can you give me?
My Italian demeanor, is much like your demeanor, when I feel I'm getting wronged, held back, not treated properly in the workplace, or not being promoted on my abilities, I am very direct in taking it up with my superiors. It has been both a key in my successes and downfalls, but it helped define exactly who I am professionally. I doubt I'm as colourful at it as you are, and I'd absolutely love to be a fly on the wall when you took up a matter with a boss you felt was not taking your best interests into account.
My advice. In the entertainment business, you've found yourself being the boss all too often with guys who had much larger egos than even you, correct? How did you feel as a boss when they came to you to ask for more money, complain about their treatment, or attempt to better position themselves within your workplace?
You are in the great position to see it from both sides, and consider that when making your approach. If it's not fixable, and you must exit, you are the smartest and most capable person of creating his own success, so you'll do just fine.
To the rest of you who just read that advice, sorry I was so specific knowing the person asking as I did. But its useful to anyone who is in an unhappy place professionally, there is two sides to the equation. Put yourself in your bosses shoes, very rarely is a boss trying to sabotage his company to make you unhappy.
Shandra asks:
What are the greatest challenges a woman like you encounters on a daily basis?
Shandra, I write this as I laugh, because you have made me write an answer that will make me look like a complete egotistical idiot. My greatest challenge every day, is dressing myself. I don't like to ever wear the same combination twice. So every night before I go to bed I do some figuring of what top I'm going to wear, and in the morning decide my lower half. I've made it a habit to cycle through clothing every 2-3 months to ensure I don't ever get seen wearing the same thing twice.
My job is not a challenge at all, it's a rush, and I can do it in my sleep, but it doesn't challenge me at all. I hope that if my co-workers read this, they are happy with my professional performance, otherwise I will have just offended them to no end.
I currently find it a minor challenge adjusting to life in Vancouver. But my GPS helps a great deal, and I'm even starting to meet a friend or two.
Domo, a sports-fan inquires:
If you were named General Manager of the 2010 Olympic Team Canada hockey program, who would be your roster?
Domo, I won't be. And without researching, I will do my best not to forget anybody, or put a foreign player on my list by mistake.
In goal- Roberto Luongo, Martin Brodeur, Carey Price
Defense- Chris Pronger, Scott Neidermayer (assuming he's still playing), Dion Phaneuf, Shae Webber, Dan Boyle, Ed Joviniski.
Forwards- Jarome Iginla, Sidney Crosby, Vincent Lecavalier, Dany Heatley, Shane Doan, Jordan Toews...
This is harder than I thought. Can I just trust Steve Yzerman to do a good job?
Hope it was as good for you the reader as it was for me the writer.
Friday, December 5, 2008
More Heartfelt advice
To be honest, I wasn't completely sure I was going to get a chance to write today's blog because I made an appointment to take a quick walk through Hell, and I wasn't sure what state of mind I would be after. But I made a commitment to write regular Friday blogs, and to give honest and heartfelt advice. So I do my best to live up to my commitments. To be straight up, my mind and heart isn't so into today, so if my advice, sucks, I apologize in advance.
Also, before I go further, last week, I made a confession, that opened me up to a vulnerable side, and a few people took the opportunity to make negative comments to me. I don't condone cheaters or cheating, I hate everything they stand for, and hate that part of me. I apologize to people reading this blog who maybe don't understand that I was attempting to be accountable for my mistakes.
That being said, lets go.
Marlie takes the times to ask:
What is the best way to convert a dishonest person to become honest?
In the last couple of hours, just today, I may have come to the harsh realization that this can't be done. Dishonesty must be a characteristic, as opposed to a habit, and once you are dishonest, it's something that appears you'll never shake.
I've known a few very dishonest people, and they are a disappointment. I've dedicated time and energy to see a better side to these people, but maybe there isn't one that exists. These people will cling to the excuse that they are just trying to have privacy, when in reality they use the veil of privacy to hide from their dishonest behavior. And heaven forbid you ever call them on it. They will play the victim. And all the while they will drag down the innocent and honest people with them. It's honestly not much different than a hopeless drunk dragging down the people that love them enough to stand beside them.
Normally in a blog like this, I would preach patience, and urge you to see the tremendous upside in a person, when encountering their dishonesty. And I'd ask you to consider their motives for dishonesty, but in the end, I'm enabling the liars by saying that.
Best advice, cut the liar out of your life. If the lie is harmful or hurtful, cut your loss that much quicker. If it's someone who is protecting themselves from CHEATING, or gambling, drinking or failing, it doesn't matter, that person has no respect for you when they lie, why should you waste your heart, your integrity, or your honest good feelings on them. They don't deserve it.
Most people who are dishonest and lie, are actually not being true to themselves far more than ever dishonest to anybody who can see through them. And yes I can see through the person who has been telling lies to me. And they don't deserve a spot in my life, or anyone else's.
I leaned on my best friend Mike for this question:
Given your blog on the current situation on Parliament Hill, and Stephane Dion's recent "heroics" as the presumed Prime Minister in waiting, how can anybody who pays attention to the Canadian economy have any faith in our country?
Thanks Mike, a great addition to my otherwise lacking blog. Dion is a boob. In fact, by the time May rolls around and he officially hands over the reigns of the party to his successor, I shudder to think about how much damage one idiot can do. Worst Liberal leader ever.
My advice to the "Coalition" would be for Jack Leyton to seize the opportunity and launch a full scale attack against the inept Liberals and increasingly arrogant Conservative Party, and attempt to move up to Opposition in the next election, almost certainly to be 2 years away.
The only thing I appreciated in the last week, was watching Stephen Harper shed his usual elite complex and actually sweat a little. But he's staring down a merry band of idiots in that coalition, and it does nothing productive for Canada's economy.
Finally Jill weighs in:
I suffer from a terrible case of seasonal depression, where I actually awake at night with panic attacks when planning family Christmas, and am always so down it takes a lot to get out of bed. What kind of advice can you offer?
They say vitamin D helps to compensate for the lack of summer sunlight, and will actually assist in lifting your spirits. I also have heard tanning in-doors at the salon will assist, and I've enjoyed noticeable effects in my life.
Try not to focus on Christmas as anything more than a celebration. Don't get stuck on the tasks at hand or the financial commitment of gift giving, and realize, Christmas is about family and people close to you coming together to celebrate the Season.
The people I've encountered with seasonal depression around this time of year, all confirm that it drastically turns around after New Years, when the days start stretching longer. So just count the days until then, and do anything necessary to get up in the morning and hopefully it will all work out.
Check back in a month and let me know if it's gotten better. Thanks for the question.
It's a cliched term to say that you've had the worst day of your life. I don't know if I have, I'm pretty sure that I've had one of the worst weeks of my life, and it's not work related (I love my new job), and it's not failure to acclimatize to the new city, I love it hear. My Karma is a little off for some seriously bad choices I've made, and to be honest with myself, I just feel like I would do anything to get back to my last "happy place". It takes a lot to be honest and put myself out there like this, and I hope that even the attacks last week to my person, and everything I've attempted to be, will still help to inspire others in some way. I'm being sappy and in some cases useless, but I do take pride in offering up honest and good advice.
So feel free to leave me comments and questions or e-mail them direct at irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca.
Also, before I go further, last week, I made a confession, that opened me up to a vulnerable side, and a few people took the opportunity to make negative comments to me. I don't condone cheaters or cheating, I hate everything they stand for, and hate that part of me. I apologize to people reading this blog who maybe don't understand that I was attempting to be accountable for my mistakes.
That being said, lets go.
Marlie takes the times to ask:
What is the best way to convert a dishonest person to become honest?
In the last couple of hours, just today, I may have come to the harsh realization that this can't be done. Dishonesty must be a characteristic, as opposed to a habit, and once you are dishonest, it's something that appears you'll never shake.
I've known a few very dishonest people, and they are a disappointment. I've dedicated time and energy to see a better side to these people, but maybe there isn't one that exists. These people will cling to the excuse that they are just trying to have privacy, when in reality they use the veil of privacy to hide from their dishonest behavior. And heaven forbid you ever call them on it. They will play the victim. And all the while they will drag down the innocent and honest people with them. It's honestly not much different than a hopeless drunk dragging down the people that love them enough to stand beside them.
Normally in a blog like this, I would preach patience, and urge you to see the tremendous upside in a person, when encountering their dishonesty. And I'd ask you to consider their motives for dishonesty, but in the end, I'm enabling the liars by saying that.
Best advice, cut the liar out of your life. If the lie is harmful or hurtful, cut your loss that much quicker. If it's someone who is protecting themselves from CHEATING, or gambling, drinking or failing, it doesn't matter, that person has no respect for you when they lie, why should you waste your heart, your integrity, or your honest good feelings on them. They don't deserve it.
Most people who are dishonest and lie, are actually not being true to themselves far more than ever dishonest to anybody who can see through them. And yes I can see through the person who has been telling lies to me. And they don't deserve a spot in my life, or anyone else's.
I leaned on my best friend Mike for this question:
Given your blog on the current situation on Parliament Hill, and Stephane Dion's recent "heroics" as the presumed Prime Minister in waiting, how can anybody who pays attention to the Canadian economy have any faith in our country?
Thanks Mike, a great addition to my otherwise lacking blog. Dion is a boob. In fact, by the time May rolls around and he officially hands over the reigns of the party to his successor, I shudder to think about how much damage one idiot can do. Worst Liberal leader ever.
My advice to the "Coalition" would be for Jack Leyton to seize the opportunity and launch a full scale attack against the inept Liberals and increasingly arrogant Conservative Party, and attempt to move up to Opposition in the next election, almost certainly to be 2 years away.
The only thing I appreciated in the last week, was watching Stephen Harper shed his usual elite complex and actually sweat a little. But he's staring down a merry band of idiots in that coalition, and it does nothing productive for Canada's economy.
Finally Jill weighs in:
I suffer from a terrible case of seasonal depression, where I actually awake at night with panic attacks when planning family Christmas, and am always so down it takes a lot to get out of bed. What kind of advice can you offer?
They say vitamin D helps to compensate for the lack of summer sunlight, and will actually assist in lifting your spirits. I also have heard tanning in-doors at the salon will assist, and I've enjoyed noticeable effects in my life.
Try not to focus on Christmas as anything more than a celebration. Don't get stuck on the tasks at hand or the financial commitment of gift giving, and realize, Christmas is about family and people close to you coming together to celebrate the Season.
The people I've encountered with seasonal depression around this time of year, all confirm that it drastically turns around after New Years, when the days start stretching longer. So just count the days until then, and do anything necessary to get up in the morning and hopefully it will all work out.
Check back in a month and let me know if it's gotten better. Thanks for the question.
It's a cliched term to say that you've had the worst day of your life. I don't know if I have, I'm pretty sure that I've had one of the worst weeks of my life, and it's not work related (I love my new job), and it's not failure to acclimatize to the new city, I love it hear. My Karma is a little off for some seriously bad choices I've made, and to be honest with myself, I just feel like I would do anything to get back to my last "happy place". It takes a lot to be honest and put myself out there like this, and I hope that even the attacks last week to my person, and everything I've attempted to be, will still help to inspire others in some way. I'm being sappy and in some cases useless, but I do take pride in offering up honest and good advice.
So feel free to leave me comments and questions or e-mail them direct at irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca.
Monday, December 1, 2008
Losing Faith in Canada
As a woman, I'm of the minority who loves sports and follows politics. My professional history, as well as my post secondary education years show a keen interest in those two subjects. Today is the first day I can say, I'm ashamed to be a Canadian. And I doubt I'm of the minority in that feeling.
Two short months ago, Canadians re-elected the Conservative Party of Canada, with Prime Minister Stephen Harper, receiving a strong endorsement from Canadians with an increase in Parliamentary seats. Regardless of your political preferences in Canada, his party has the will of Canadians, to govern this country to the best of their ability.
A hot button issue for obvious reasons is the economy. And last week, Finance Minister Jim Flaherty gave an "economic update" which called for cuts in Government spending, and a highly controversial policy to abolish the $1.95 per vote public subsidy for Political parties. The update failed to address the economic crisis, and no mention of "stimulus" was mentioned, and immediately negotiations commenced between the Opposition Liberals, New Democrats and the separatist Bloc Quebecois parties.
As of today, a letter was delivered to the Governor General, informing the Queen's Representative, that the Conservatives have lost the confidence of Parliament, and a coalition is prepared to step up and form a government with out-going Liberal leader Stephane Dion as the new Prime Minister. And I'm irate!
First let me say, that I have a very strong political motivation and it doesn't lean to the right at all. I did not vote for the current Party in government. And I do believe any budget that does not include immediate remedies to the economic crisis should be voted down. Knowing this, the Conservatives should not have mis-calculated the political landscape and anticipated the Liberals would not push an issue of confidence because of their lame duck leader. Dion will make the worst ever Prime Minister Canada has ever seen. Worse than Kim Campbell, who inherited the job from Brian Mulroney. He's a bumbling buffoon, who's own Party exiled immediately after the election of a mere 8 weeks ago. This is bad for the country.
Equally, if not more disturbing, is a governing Coalition where the Separatists from Quebec, who have denounced the best interests of Canada as a whole, will supply the necessary balance of power. The Bloc will now carry enough power to immediately force a referendum in Quebec, in an attempt once again to separate, and Canada as a whole will be useless to prevent it.
Western Alienation becomes a very real concern, when you consider that 70% of the vote from Manitoba westward voted Conservative, and they will now see this as nothing more than an opportunistic power play.
Suffering the worst will be Michael Ignatieff, Bob Rae and any other liberal leader hopefuls who will have to lead this party into the next election, with Canadian so bitterly divided.
There has been no poll to enforce that this is the will of Canadians, and I shutter to think what the average Canadian thinks about the events about to transpire. How is this any different than a power coup in a Communist Country?
Two short months ago, Canadians re-elected the Conservative Party of Canada, with Prime Minister Stephen Harper, receiving a strong endorsement from Canadians with an increase in Parliamentary seats. Regardless of your political preferences in Canada, his party has the will of Canadians, to govern this country to the best of their ability.
A hot button issue for obvious reasons is the economy. And last week, Finance Minister Jim Flaherty gave an "economic update" which called for cuts in Government spending, and a highly controversial policy to abolish the $1.95 per vote public subsidy for Political parties. The update failed to address the economic crisis, and no mention of "stimulus" was mentioned, and immediately negotiations commenced between the Opposition Liberals, New Democrats and the separatist Bloc Quebecois parties.
As of today, a letter was delivered to the Governor General, informing the Queen's Representative, that the Conservatives have lost the confidence of Parliament, and a coalition is prepared to step up and form a government with out-going Liberal leader Stephane Dion as the new Prime Minister. And I'm irate!
First let me say, that I have a very strong political motivation and it doesn't lean to the right at all. I did not vote for the current Party in government. And I do believe any budget that does not include immediate remedies to the economic crisis should be voted down. Knowing this, the Conservatives should not have mis-calculated the political landscape and anticipated the Liberals would not push an issue of confidence because of their lame duck leader. Dion will make the worst ever Prime Minister Canada has ever seen. Worse than Kim Campbell, who inherited the job from Brian Mulroney. He's a bumbling buffoon, who's own Party exiled immediately after the election of a mere 8 weeks ago. This is bad for the country.
Equally, if not more disturbing, is a governing Coalition where the Separatists from Quebec, who have denounced the best interests of Canada as a whole, will supply the necessary balance of power. The Bloc will now carry enough power to immediately force a referendum in Quebec, in an attempt once again to separate, and Canada as a whole will be useless to prevent it.
Western Alienation becomes a very real concern, when you consider that 70% of the vote from Manitoba westward voted Conservative, and they will now see this as nothing more than an opportunistic power play.
Suffering the worst will be Michael Ignatieff, Bob Rae and any other liberal leader hopefuls who will have to lead this party into the next election, with Canadian so bitterly divided.
There has been no poll to enforce that this is the will of Canadians, and I shutter to think what the average Canadian thinks about the events about to transpire. How is this any different than a power coup in a Communist Country?
Friday, November 28, 2008
TGIF
First let me mention that I spilled a soft drink on my keyboard yesterday, so this may take a little longer than normal to type, and if there is weird typos, I will try to fix them before I post. Things are ok in Vancouver, it's a big City to be all alone in but for the most part it's been good and I'm adjusting well.
This is not an official advice question, but many are asking about why I took down my earlier blog this week. Those who read it, about 45 in total, all told me that it was one of the most powerful and insightful blogs about love. But I did infringe on two people's privacy who I respect and in one case love like a sibling, so when I considered their feelings it had to go. Sorry.
So, here's what I've come up with for this Friday to help people with questions on their mind.
Stacey asks:
What are your thoughts on cheaters? Why do they do it, can they be helped?
Stacey, you're question hit me way too close to home. I have more strict guidelines about what I consider to be cheating. That includes, planning to have sex when you are in a sexual relationship. Trying to have sex when you are in a sexual relationship, and talking about having sex with someone else (ie Phone Sex) when you are in a sexual relationship. For me it doesn't even have to be a committed relationship, giving your body to somebody should only happen one situation at a time. Girls who have sex with one guy one night, then a different guy the next night, and back and forth aren't being faithful to either guy, and worse not being faithful or true to themselves.
Now, that I've set the tone to be hypocritical, I've cheated. And I feel like shit everyday to this day for it. I have committed the sin of cheating on more than one occasion. I've had sexual flings with 3 partners in the span of two weeks, which weren't intended to be one night stands, and unfortunately, ended up that way, and its something I'm not proud of. I also developed very serious feelings for a serious boyfriends, best friend (he was my best friend as well), and that was confusing. To his credit, the best friend could not have handled it better, he respected everyone involved and never allowed it to get awkward, and me and my boyfriend broke up within days of me screwing up.
I can speak from my experience that cheating occurred because I lost my self identity for a time. I failed to remember who I was, the things that defined me, and how committed I remain to being true to myself. It all happened in the span of three short months, and it was a downward spiral I was marred in, and to do it all over again, I would have removed myself from all of the situations.
So I don't hate "cheaters", I can relate to them and I hate to say I've been there. To have a healthy relationship, two people have to be committed to respecting and building with each other. I only know one person in this world who has shown an ability to forgive and accept cheating, and he's very rare, and one of a kind in so many ways. His only reason for being able to forgive cheating is he can accurately define that it's a result of a larger underlying problem, and he can focus on that. In his situation he worked his ass off to be understanding, and get to the root of the issue. Of course, a relationship needs two healthy hearts to be successful and there was no success in the end. But I believe it wasn't for a lack of his effort.
Hope it helps.
Christian weighs in:
Where will Mats Sundin end up playing? What is his delay in choosing a team?
Mats has been very aloof in what he is hoping to accomplish. If it's a Stanley Cup, he should give very serious consideration to the Montreal Canadiens. If it's money, the Vancouver Canucks offered a very inflated $10Million per for 2 years. Of course with the Canadian dollar sinking about .15-.20 cents since then, I wonder if that offer remains on the table. If it was pure comfort and where his heart is, he'd come to Toronto, and there are many rumours that Brian Burke will make that his first order of business. However, if TO was the sentimental place, Mats sure has taken his sweet ass time about it. I don't figure Philadelphia or New York into the outcome, but stranger things have happened.
Roderick has an interesting inquiry:
In many years of knowing you, I've never asked you about your viewpoint on the environment, and Global Warming. In the last Canadian and US election, an issue that would have dominated the campaigns a short year ago, was placed distantly second to the sagging economy. What do you think?
Roddy, great question my friend!!! I don't have a strong opinion on the environment unfortunately, though I realize it is a very real concern. Right now the economic crisis has negatively affected any person who relies on the Stock Market to ensure their long-term comfort. And money is always going to be a more tangible issue than the environment until such a time as Medical experts can tie the effect of Global Warming on people's everyday health.
I do believe conditions such as Asthma, Skin Cancer, Lung Cancer, and Overall Respiratory Health can and should be associated directly with studies on the environment. I wish there was more light shed on the direct correlation of Natural Disasters and the spin-off effects of Global Warming and the lack of emission control initiatives.
If and it's gigantic IF because it will have a very negative effect on the economy to regulate this, the experts can get some light shed on their studies and make a fool proof case of those relations mentioned above, I could see more of an effort to protect the environment. Otherwise, everyday dollars and cents will continue to dominate the everyday people's mind.
That's all I've got!
Comments, questions, and especially compliments should be sent to irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca or posted in the appropriate section. Have a good weekend.
This is not an official advice question, but many are asking about why I took down my earlier blog this week. Those who read it, about 45 in total, all told me that it was one of the most powerful and insightful blogs about love. But I did infringe on two people's privacy who I respect and in one case love like a sibling, so when I considered their feelings it had to go. Sorry.
So, here's what I've come up with for this Friday to help people with questions on their mind.
Stacey asks:
What are your thoughts on cheaters? Why do they do it, can they be helped?
Stacey, you're question hit me way too close to home. I have more strict guidelines about what I consider to be cheating. That includes, planning to have sex when you are in a sexual relationship. Trying to have sex when you are in a sexual relationship, and talking about having sex with someone else (ie Phone Sex) when you are in a sexual relationship. For me it doesn't even have to be a committed relationship, giving your body to somebody should only happen one situation at a time. Girls who have sex with one guy one night, then a different guy the next night, and back and forth aren't being faithful to either guy, and worse not being faithful or true to themselves.
Now, that I've set the tone to be hypocritical, I've cheated. And I feel like shit everyday to this day for it. I have committed the sin of cheating on more than one occasion. I've had sexual flings with 3 partners in the span of two weeks, which weren't intended to be one night stands, and unfortunately, ended up that way, and its something I'm not proud of. I also developed very serious feelings for a serious boyfriends, best friend (he was my best friend as well), and that was confusing. To his credit, the best friend could not have handled it better, he respected everyone involved and never allowed it to get awkward, and me and my boyfriend broke up within days of me screwing up.
I can speak from my experience that cheating occurred because I lost my self identity for a time. I failed to remember who I was, the things that defined me, and how committed I remain to being true to myself. It all happened in the span of three short months, and it was a downward spiral I was marred in, and to do it all over again, I would have removed myself from all of the situations.
So I don't hate "cheaters", I can relate to them and I hate to say I've been there. To have a healthy relationship, two people have to be committed to respecting and building with each other. I only know one person in this world who has shown an ability to forgive and accept cheating, and he's very rare, and one of a kind in so many ways. His only reason for being able to forgive cheating is he can accurately define that it's a result of a larger underlying problem, and he can focus on that. In his situation he worked his ass off to be understanding, and get to the root of the issue. Of course, a relationship needs two healthy hearts to be successful and there was no success in the end. But I believe it wasn't for a lack of his effort.
Hope it helps.
Christian weighs in:
Where will Mats Sundin end up playing? What is his delay in choosing a team?
Mats has been very aloof in what he is hoping to accomplish. If it's a Stanley Cup, he should give very serious consideration to the Montreal Canadiens. If it's money, the Vancouver Canucks offered a very inflated $10Million per for 2 years. Of course with the Canadian dollar sinking about .15-.20 cents since then, I wonder if that offer remains on the table. If it was pure comfort and where his heart is, he'd come to Toronto, and there are many rumours that Brian Burke will make that his first order of business. However, if TO was the sentimental place, Mats sure has taken his sweet ass time about it. I don't figure Philadelphia or New York into the outcome, but stranger things have happened.
Roderick has an interesting inquiry:
In many years of knowing you, I've never asked you about your viewpoint on the environment, and Global Warming. In the last Canadian and US election, an issue that would have dominated the campaigns a short year ago, was placed distantly second to the sagging economy. What do you think?
Roddy, great question my friend!!! I don't have a strong opinion on the environment unfortunately, though I realize it is a very real concern. Right now the economic crisis has negatively affected any person who relies on the Stock Market to ensure their long-term comfort. And money is always going to be a more tangible issue than the environment until such a time as Medical experts can tie the effect of Global Warming on people's everyday health.
I do believe conditions such as Asthma, Skin Cancer, Lung Cancer, and Overall Respiratory Health can and should be associated directly with studies on the environment. I wish there was more light shed on the direct correlation of Natural Disasters and the spin-off effects of Global Warming and the lack of emission control initiatives.
If and it's gigantic IF because it will have a very negative effect on the economy to regulate this, the experts can get some light shed on their studies and make a fool proof case of those relations mentioned above, I could see more of an effort to protect the environment. Otherwise, everyday dollars and cents will continue to dominate the everyday people's mind.
That's all I've got!
Comments, questions, and especially compliments should be sent to irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca or posted in the appropriate section. Have a good weekend.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
My First West Coast Blitz
It's been a very very hectic week for me, moving 5 Provinces West is not easy, although you pick up 3 hours along the way, so it's the closest thing to time-travel I will ever encounter. I appreciate all of your questions, both in the comment section, and e-mailed to me at irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca.
Not to inflate my own tires, I do this to help, and I don't research any of the questions asked. What you read is my honest advice as someone who tries to live life, see only the best in others, and bring out the best in myself.
So here goes:
Johnny Asks,
Do you watch NFL? What are your thoughts on teams that have over-achieved this year, and under-achieved? What the hell is wrong with Peyton Manning this year?
On Peyton Manning, it's a product of two major off-season surgeries. I still believe he's one of the top three QB's in the game, but he rushed his rehab to be at the helm of the Colts for the start of the season. Indy is still 6-4 and I would bet on them making the post season.
3 weeks ago I would have said the biggest over-achiever was the Buffalo Bills, but reality has set in and they are on their way to missing the playoffs. Who would have guessed the Tennessee Titans with Vince Young hurt and Kerry Collins behind pivot would be undefeated. I still believe they are a pretender, but who knows this is a story book season for the team. Other surprises, Miami, The Jets (even with Favre), Washington, Minnesota (especially with old man Gus Ferotte at the helm), Carolina (has teased being great for years, and 8-2 proves they are the real deal) and Arizona. The only contender out of the over-achievers in my books is the Titans, and mark my words they don't make it to the Conference Championship.
Under-achieving teams: Cleveland and San Diego are two teams I expected way more from. Dallas, Indy, New England, and Seattle all have justifiable injuries to excuse their performance. My pick for Superbowl Champions remains New York Giants over Pittsburg Steelers. Close game, but Giants will repeat.
To answer your question, yes I follow the NFL.
Richard from Nebraska wonders:
Hillary Clinton maybe named Secretary of State in the new Barack Obama cabinet. Do you think this is a positive move for her? Does it put her one step closer to the White House?
The Secretary of State is an International portfolio where the person who carries that Cabinet post, has to all too often mend fences that a US Government sacrifices to reach it's objectives and goals. Colin Powell's reputation was forever tarnished when he went to the United Nations with the bold statement, "We Know There is Weapons of Mass Destruction", which was later proved false and compromised his credibility Internationally.
I believe Hillary is the best Democrat for this post, and it's looking more like she will take it. As the First Lady to President Bill Clinton, she enjoyed a favorable International profile, she's more than capable of being tough, yet has an obvious softer side. She will be a huge upgrade from Condeleeza Rice. I like it.
Does it put her in line for a future Presidency. She's still very young, and a star in the Democratic party, but for her to get a shot, Obama has got to lose in 4 years. Should Obama win 2 terms, in 8 years you have to expect Joe Biden would be the Democratic Nominee, and Hillary would then be 12 years at the earliest from her shot, and that's barring any young Democrats coming up the ranks or Biden winning. So it's a step towards the job, but a lot of things have to happen for her to get her shot.
Tara challenges me:
Its clear from reading your advice that you believe in love. However, you said you have never been good at love, or lucky in love or whatever the quote was.
I have said that I'm a hopeless romantic, and yes, though I haven't found the forever kind of love I believe in true love and real love. The kind of love that songs and movies are made of.
I've had true love and like a stupid girl, or a love sick fool I sacrificed it, and that is the worst realization in the world. It's like the day you realize what you lost, the person who actually meant so much to you, has moved on and is happy without you, it really doesn't matter how great of spot you're in. Or how happy you feel in a relationship, that realization of loss sucks.
SO I always encourage people to make sure there is no love left when moving on. Matters of the heart have been known to fool the brain, and you can think you are as happy as you've ever been after losing a true love, and something happens to hit you where it hurts. And you realize you've made mistakes.
True love is the most amazing feeling. Losing true love is the worst.
So there you go, enjoy your weekends folks!
Not to inflate my own tires, I do this to help, and I don't research any of the questions asked. What you read is my honest advice as someone who tries to live life, see only the best in others, and bring out the best in myself.
So here goes:
Johnny Asks,
Do you watch NFL? What are your thoughts on teams that have over-achieved this year, and under-achieved? What the hell is wrong with Peyton Manning this year?
On Peyton Manning, it's a product of two major off-season surgeries. I still believe he's one of the top three QB's in the game, but he rushed his rehab to be at the helm of the Colts for the start of the season. Indy is still 6-4 and I would bet on them making the post season.
3 weeks ago I would have said the biggest over-achiever was the Buffalo Bills, but reality has set in and they are on their way to missing the playoffs. Who would have guessed the Tennessee Titans with Vince Young hurt and Kerry Collins behind pivot would be undefeated. I still believe they are a pretender, but who knows this is a story book season for the team. Other surprises, Miami, The Jets (even with Favre), Washington, Minnesota (especially with old man Gus Ferotte at the helm), Carolina (has teased being great for years, and 8-2 proves they are the real deal) and Arizona. The only contender out of the over-achievers in my books is the Titans, and mark my words they don't make it to the Conference Championship.
Under-achieving teams: Cleveland and San Diego are two teams I expected way more from. Dallas, Indy, New England, and Seattle all have justifiable injuries to excuse their performance. My pick for Superbowl Champions remains New York Giants over Pittsburg Steelers. Close game, but Giants will repeat.
To answer your question, yes I follow the NFL.
Richard from Nebraska wonders:
Hillary Clinton maybe named Secretary of State in the new Barack Obama cabinet. Do you think this is a positive move for her? Does it put her one step closer to the White House?
The Secretary of State is an International portfolio where the person who carries that Cabinet post, has to all too often mend fences that a US Government sacrifices to reach it's objectives and goals. Colin Powell's reputation was forever tarnished when he went to the United Nations with the bold statement, "We Know There is Weapons of Mass Destruction", which was later proved false and compromised his credibility Internationally.
I believe Hillary is the best Democrat for this post, and it's looking more like she will take it. As the First Lady to President Bill Clinton, she enjoyed a favorable International profile, she's more than capable of being tough, yet has an obvious softer side. She will be a huge upgrade from Condeleeza Rice. I like it.
Does it put her in line for a future Presidency. She's still very young, and a star in the Democratic party, but for her to get a shot, Obama has got to lose in 4 years. Should Obama win 2 terms, in 8 years you have to expect Joe Biden would be the Democratic Nominee, and Hillary would then be 12 years at the earliest from her shot, and that's barring any young Democrats coming up the ranks or Biden winning. So it's a step towards the job, but a lot of things have to happen for her to get her shot.
Tara challenges me:
Its clear from reading your advice that you believe in love. However, you said you have never been good at love, or lucky in love or whatever the quote was.
I have said that I'm a hopeless romantic, and yes, though I haven't found the forever kind of love I believe in true love and real love. The kind of love that songs and movies are made of.
I've had true love and like a stupid girl, or a love sick fool I sacrificed it, and that is the worst realization in the world. It's like the day you realize what you lost, the person who actually meant so much to you, has moved on and is happy without you, it really doesn't matter how great of spot you're in. Or how happy you feel in a relationship, that realization of loss sucks.
SO I always encourage people to make sure there is no love left when moving on. Matters of the heart have been known to fool the brain, and you can think you are as happy as you've ever been after losing a true love, and something happens to hit you where it hurts. And you realize you've made mistakes.
True love is the most amazing feeling. Losing true love is the worst.
So there you go, enjoy your weekends folks!
Monday, November 17, 2008
Major Change: IDV heads West
I alluded to this in my Friday blog, and today wanted to talk more openly about it. I have accepted a position in Vancouver and am now officially a resident of the West Coast. That means in 3 very short months I've gone from living in Toronto, moving to Montreal, contemplating a move to Winnipeg and settling on the gentle winters of Vancouver. And I've only been here a couple of days but I couldn't be happier, what a beautiful city.
This was a very agonizing decision for me, and one that I couldn't turn down either. With the recent economic downturn, my financial picture once seeming so secure, didn't seem as quite as safe of decision, to just gallivant all over the world for the entire winter. Sometimes in life you crave structure and stability over spontaneity and freedom, this was that moment.
I've also had so much going on in my personal life, that the need for something to sink my teeth into became a major priority. Montreal was only supposed to be a one month stop over, but the friends I've met there will likely have a place in my life for many years to come. The moment of clarity when you realize you can't run away from your life, your problems, your reason for existence, by travelling excessively is a moment of freedom in itself. And I hit that about 10 short days ago when I agreed to the new position in Van.
So, here I am, ready for the next challenge, which will both be a professional and personal one. I'm as hyped as I've been for a very long time, and am certain that this new challenge will be one that I will embrace, tackle and excel at in no time at all. To all my friends I thank you for your constant support, in more ways than you can ever know, I may need to lean on you all in the coming weeks.
To one very special friend, who is like a brother to me, and that means we have our little spats. I'm sorry I've been so crazy lately, it was great seeing you so happy last week. You went through hell since September, and you can put it all behind you, and show off that sweet smile again. There was absolutely no shame in what happened, and you handled it better than most, and now you can focus on only yourself and be better than you've ever been.
This was a very agonizing decision for me, and one that I couldn't turn down either. With the recent economic downturn, my financial picture once seeming so secure, didn't seem as quite as safe of decision, to just gallivant all over the world for the entire winter. Sometimes in life you crave structure and stability over spontaneity and freedom, this was that moment.
I've also had so much going on in my personal life, that the need for something to sink my teeth into became a major priority. Montreal was only supposed to be a one month stop over, but the friends I've met there will likely have a place in my life for many years to come. The moment of clarity when you realize you can't run away from your life, your problems, your reason for existence, by travelling excessively is a moment of freedom in itself. And I hit that about 10 short days ago when I agreed to the new position in Van.
So, here I am, ready for the next challenge, which will both be a professional and personal one. I'm as hyped as I've been for a very long time, and am certain that this new challenge will be one that I will embrace, tackle and excel at in no time at all. To all my friends I thank you for your constant support, in more ways than you can ever know, I may need to lean on you all in the coming weeks.
To one very special friend, who is like a brother to me, and that means we have our little spats. I'm sorry I've been so crazy lately, it was great seeing you so happy last week. You went through hell since September, and you can put it all behind you, and show off that sweet smile again. There was absolutely no shame in what happened, and you handled it better than most, and now you can focus on only yourself and be better than you've ever been.
Friday, November 14, 2008
Fridays are days to Get Blitzed!
Ok, so my blog the other day was apparently not provoking enough because nobody commented on Remembrance Day. That was something I felt pretty strongly about. I have a huge blog I'm working on for Monday or Tuesday about a major shake up in my life.
Fridays are a day where I like to offer up some advice. Many people have told me they appreciate my advice blogs, and that my advice helps them. Some have suggested that it's useless, and I don't know what I'm talking about. Apparently many people read my Friday blogs, and that's the point. Thank you for that.
Here's my advice this week. All three were legitimate blog reader questions, I actually had 5 posed to me and tried to pick the best ones. I appreciate all the questions, and the two I didn't answer in my blog I still sent a personal e-mail with an answer.
Question from Phil:
What are your thoughts on a second NHL team in Toronto? On OTR, Michael Landsberg asked Gary Bettman who side-stepped the question. Your thoughts? Would it fly?
Phil, it most definitely would fly. Toronto is the healthiest market for the NHL, and the Air Canada Centre is always full for hockey. Apparently a second team would play in a separate sports complex, and that would provide one heck of a rivalry with Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment. The sports media, the sports fan, and the NHL as a whole would benefit greatly from this moving forward, so only time will tell if the NHL braintrust will work quickly to make this happen.
Question by e-mail from Audrey:
How do you forgive and forget a mistake that hurt you emotionally?
No two people are the same, Audrey, so my advice is strictly my opinion and I don't even know the severity. In any person there is the good they brought to your relationship, and there is the mistakes that hurt your relationship. That relationship can be friendship, it can be dating, and it can be a family relationship.
I believe one good virtue is worthy of 5 or 10 mistakes. I spend my whole life looking at the best in the people I know. It obviously depends on the level of mistake. The best in people should always be remembered first, it should be embraced ahead of all else. And when that is the case, forgiveness is a whole lot easier.
You will never forget the pain, and maybe you shouldn't. But the strength of any good friendship, intimate relationship or family bond is a healthy ability to forgive.
Judging by the fact you have asked that question, it's clear to me that you want to forgive and that's another vital step.
Good luck, let me know.
Question 3
Elton asks:
What is the greatest City you've ever visited, lived in or worked in?
I don't consider this to be a question of advice, but still like it just the same Elton...
The Big Apple, New York was my favorite city, no doubt. I almost moved there for work a few short months ago, it's just so Italian. Hard place not to love. It's hard nosed and resilient. The nightlife is like no other, and the pizza is worth dieing for.
Canadian City is a toss up between Winnipeg, because people are actually so friendly there, and its got character and Regina. If you've ever gone to the Queen City for a CFL football game, you'll know why. It's very Green Bay.
I've been to so many amazing places abroad, but those are my North American choices.
There you have it. Hope it helps people! Send your feedback and questions to irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca or leave it in the comment section.
Fridays are a day where I like to offer up some advice. Many people have told me they appreciate my advice blogs, and that my advice helps them. Some have suggested that it's useless, and I don't know what I'm talking about. Apparently many people read my Friday blogs, and that's the point. Thank you for that.
Here's my advice this week. All three were legitimate blog reader questions, I actually had 5 posed to me and tried to pick the best ones. I appreciate all the questions, and the two I didn't answer in my blog I still sent a personal e-mail with an answer.
Question from Phil:
What are your thoughts on a second NHL team in Toronto? On OTR, Michael Landsberg asked Gary Bettman who side-stepped the question. Your thoughts? Would it fly?
Phil, it most definitely would fly. Toronto is the healthiest market for the NHL, and the Air Canada Centre is always full for hockey. Apparently a second team would play in a separate sports complex, and that would provide one heck of a rivalry with Maple Leaf Sports and Entertainment. The sports media, the sports fan, and the NHL as a whole would benefit greatly from this moving forward, so only time will tell if the NHL braintrust will work quickly to make this happen.
Question by e-mail from Audrey:
How do you forgive and forget a mistake that hurt you emotionally?
No two people are the same, Audrey, so my advice is strictly my opinion and I don't even know the severity. In any person there is the good they brought to your relationship, and there is the mistakes that hurt your relationship. That relationship can be friendship, it can be dating, and it can be a family relationship.
I believe one good virtue is worthy of 5 or 10 mistakes. I spend my whole life looking at the best in the people I know. It obviously depends on the level of mistake. The best in people should always be remembered first, it should be embraced ahead of all else. And when that is the case, forgiveness is a whole lot easier.
You will never forget the pain, and maybe you shouldn't. But the strength of any good friendship, intimate relationship or family bond is a healthy ability to forgive.
Judging by the fact you have asked that question, it's clear to me that you want to forgive and that's another vital step.
Good luck, let me know.
Question 3
Elton asks:
What is the greatest City you've ever visited, lived in or worked in?
I don't consider this to be a question of advice, but still like it just the same Elton...
The Big Apple, New York was my favorite city, no doubt. I almost moved there for work a few short months ago, it's just so Italian. Hard place not to love. It's hard nosed and resilient. The nightlife is like no other, and the pizza is worth dieing for.
Canadian City is a toss up between Winnipeg, because people are actually so friendly there, and its got character and Regina. If you've ever gone to the Queen City for a CFL football game, you'll know why. It's very Green Bay.
I've been to so many amazing places abroad, but those are my North American choices.
There you have it. Hope it helps people! Send your feedback and questions to irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca or leave it in the comment section.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
A Day To Remember, Not Shop!
A major pet peeve of mine is how November 11, a day set aside to remember those who served their Country in war and peace, has become a routine day where people can shop like they can on any given Sunday. Remembrance Day has always been a day where people pause to pay tribute to those who have all to often lost their lives in service to Canada in War. I can not understand how it became a day that unofficially starts the Christmas shopping blitz.
I have lost relatives in Wars. Just because it was more than 50 years ago, doesn't make Remembrance Day any less important to me. In the last 15 years, November 11 has become just another day, minus some morning festivities where dignitaries and War Veterans pause for ceremonies. Then 2 hours later, Canada goes right back into full motion, and allows all those die hard shoppers 5 hours to get back into stores and carry on, business as usual.
I consider myself fortunate and my family to be fortunate, that we have not had to lose anyone in Afghanistan war effort, that Canada currently finds itself embroiled in. But for the hundreds of families who have lost loved ones to service in Afghanistan, how much shopping do you expect they are doing on November 11th at 3 in the afternoon? I'd guess next to none. This is their day, a day where they can stop and respect their family members contribution to worldwide peace in the name of War, and it's a day where Canada should absolutely stand-still for 24 hours and reflect on the enormous sacrifice our soldiers continue to make.
So today, I relish my time off of my usual grind, I pay my respects to Canadian who have given their life in war, but I also take a moment to recognize those who continue to make heroic efforts in the name of Peace around the world. Here's to you.
I have lost relatives in Wars. Just because it was more than 50 years ago, doesn't make Remembrance Day any less important to me. In the last 15 years, November 11 has become just another day, minus some morning festivities where dignitaries and War Veterans pause for ceremonies. Then 2 hours later, Canada goes right back into full motion, and allows all those die hard shoppers 5 hours to get back into stores and carry on, business as usual.
I consider myself fortunate and my family to be fortunate, that we have not had to lose anyone in Afghanistan war effort, that Canada currently finds itself embroiled in. But for the hundreds of families who have lost loved ones to service in Afghanistan, how much shopping do you expect they are doing on November 11th at 3 in the afternoon? I'd guess next to none. This is their day, a day where they can stop and respect their family members contribution to worldwide peace in the name of War, and it's a day where Canada should absolutely stand-still for 24 hours and reflect on the enormous sacrifice our soldiers continue to make.
So today, I relish my time off of my usual grind, I pay my respects to Canadian who have given their life in war, but I also take a moment to recognize those who continue to make heroic efforts in the name of Peace around the world. Here's to you.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Blitz Me Again!
I appreciate all the positive feedback from my blog last Friday where I opened the floor to be questioned and give my best impartial, yet non-researched advice. This week I had two strangers ask me questions, and one I had to lean on a friend to feed me one. Hopefully by next Friday, we can have all three be blog readers.
Question 1:
Broken said...
I have a question for you. If I was in a relationship and pushed away someone when I knew I loved them, to the point where I hurt them, and it got way out of hand. What steps would you take to rectify it? I messed up a lot, lied and took for granted the best thing I ever had. Please help Irene.
Hi Broken. Great question, one that hits a little bit close to home for me personally, and one that I'm sure just about any experienced person with relationships can identify with.
First off, even if the person you hurt doesn't open their heart for you to come back, and rebuild a relationship, I'm quite confident that they will open their ears and listen to you, accept your apology and even respect your accountability. And who knows maybe they will have an apology of their own for you. If you realized you took the relationship and person for granted, and that when it was good it was the "best thing you ever had" it will probably require a conscious choice to make better decisions in the future, whether that be with the person you are risk of completely losing, or the next person you have in your life.
So steps I would take: 1. Reach out to the person who seems lost. 2. Show accountability and responsibility. 3. Listen to this person's reaction and 4. Hope for the best, yet prepare for the worst. I'm a big proponent for communication and believe this can and maybe will work itself out.
Question 2:
Ryan asks:
Planning a winter vacation for my girlfriend and I. We've been together 6 months, and it's hard to know what is too much for the amount of time we've been together and what is just right. Any suggestions.
Ryan, I'm not a relationship wizard. My longest was 3 years, my shortest was 3 hours. A whole lot of variables enter into this decision, but here's what you should consider. Who is paying for the vacation? If it's all you, then it may not hurt to just plan a good weekend get away for the relationship to see where it's at. Maybe a weekend in a hotel, or a two hour drive away. If you are splitting it, perhaps fly to some place and take in the night life, maybe a concert and experience a new city together.
One of my favorite couple's vacation which was relatively early on, with a guy was renting a cabin for a weekend and just spending time together chilling and cuddling, and having a blast. It's getting close to winter, so doing too much outdoors may make that a challenge. Hope I helped, you kinda stumped me there, because I have to assume where you two are at after 6 months. I know couples that are married in that time.
Question 3:
From my best friend Mike:
Knowing that you follow the economics of sports, and are a huge Toronto Maple Leafs fan, I want to know what your expectation of the effect of the current economic crisis in North America will have on the NHL specifically, but sports in general.
Great question Mikey-boy. First it won't have even a minimal effect on Toronto or Montreal, although the Canadian dollar falling twenty cents is a major kick in the butt. Because the crisis is across North America, and I believe will remedy itself in 6 months to a year, the effect will be short-term. I'd be anxious to see what effect it will have to League revenues which have an effect on Salary Cap, and players earnings. If the Cap shrinks, how big of an accounting mess could that be? I also think it helps Jim Ballsillie in his goal of securing a Southern US franchise to relocate to Ontario, and it could help you in Winnipeg benefit in getting an NHL team. But the dollar could hurt that too.
In other sports, I don't look at a gigantic decline, the NFL still delivers rock solid TV ratings which will actually go up during an economic downturn, as more people will stay in and watch TV. Major League Baseball will not see a major impact this year, if the recession goes 3 years then it may.
Once again if you would like to pose your questions to me, send them to irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca or post them on the comment board. I appreciate all the positive feedback from you.
Question 1:
Broken said...
I have a question for you. If I was in a relationship and pushed away someone when I knew I loved them, to the point where I hurt them, and it got way out of hand. What steps would you take to rectify it? I messed up a lot, lied and took for granted the best thing I ever had. Please help Irene.
Hi Broken. Great question, one that hits a little bit close to home for me personally, and one that I'm sure just about any experienced person with relationships can identify with.
First off, even if the person you hurt doesn't open their heart for you to come back, and rebuild a relationship, I'm quite confident that they will open their ears and listen to you, accept your apology and even respect your accountability. And who knows maybe they will have an apology of their own for you. If you realized you took the relationship and person for granted, and that when it was good it was the "best thing you ever had" it will probably require a conscious choice to make better decisions in the future, whether that be with the person you are risk of completely losing, or the next person you have in your life.
So steps I would take: 1. Reach out to the person who seems lost. 2. Show accountability and responsibility. 3. Listen to this person's reaction and 4. Hope for the best, yet prepare for the worst. I'm a big proponent for communication and believe this can and maybe will work itself out.
Question 2:
Ryan asks:
Planning a winter vacation for my girlfriend and I. We've been together 6 months, and it's hard to know what is too much for the amount of time we've been together and what is just right. Any suggestions.
Ryan, I'm not a relationship wizard. My longest was 3 years, my shortest was 3 hours. A whole lot of variables enter into this decision, but here's what you should consider. Who is paying for the vacation? If it's all you, then it may not hurt to just plan a good weekend get away for the relationship to see where it's at. Maybe a weekend in a hotel, or a two hour drive away. If you are splitting it, perhaps fly to some place and take in the night life, maybe a concert and experience a new city together.
One of my favorite couple's vacation which was relatively early on, with a guy was renting a cabin for a weekend and just spending time together chilling and cuddling, and having a blast. It's getting close to winter, so doing too much outdoors may make that a challenge. Hope I helped, you kinda stumped me there, because I have to assume where you two are at after 6 months. I know couples that are married in that time.
Question 3:
From my best friend Mike:
Knowing that you follow the economics of sports, and are a huge Toronto Maple Leafs fan, I want to know what your expectation of the effect of the current economic crisis in North America will have on the NHL specifically, but sports in general.
Great question Mikey-boy. First it won't have even a minimal effect on Toronto or Montreal, although the Canadian dollar falling twenty cents is a major kick in the butt. Because the crisis is across North America, and I believe will remedy itself in 6 months to a year, the effect will be short-term. I'd be anxious to see what effect it will have to League revenues which have an effect on Salary Cap, and players earnings. If the Cap shrinks, how big of an accounting mess could that be? I also think it helps Jim Ballsillie in his goal of securing a Southern US franchise to relocate to Ontario, and it could help you in Winnipeg benefit in getting an NHL team. But the dollar could hurt that too.
In other sports, I don't look at a gigantic decline, the NFL still delivers rock solid TV ratings which will actually go up during an economic downturn, as more people will stay in and watch TV. Major League Baseball will not see a major impact this year, if the recession goes 3 years then it may.
Once again if you would like to pose your questions to me, send them to irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca or post them on the comment board. I appreciate all the positive feedback from you.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Once You Go Black...
There is a crude saying out there that suggests "Once You Go Black, You Never Go Back" and that's a reference to dating or something like that. Well today, the United States of America seems primed to elect the first ever African American President of all-time. And Barrack Obama appears ready to be the best US President since Bill Clinton, with worlds of potential to eclipse the 42nd President. Once the US elects a Black President, really there's no going back.
What a huge symbolic step this is for the American people, and eclipses much of the major milestones in US history.
I don't get to vote in the United States, though much of my family does, and much of my family is politically divided. In Canada where I do vote, I'm not loyal to one political party, and can't call myself left leaning or right wing, I'm pretty much middle of the road. If there is a major issue that gets to me, I vote that way. I pay very close attention to US politics and policies, and have been lucky to interview 2 First Lady's in my media career, so that helps promote my interest in South of the Border politics.
Throughout Primary season, I believed Barrack was a lot of amazing hype, with a great PR machine behind him, and lacked in issues and experience to Hillary Clinton. In the last 8 weeks of this campaign, I've seen a more well rounded Obama, and a man who is ready to step up and lead the world starting tomorrow morning. I'm now thoroughly convinced that Obama will have an amazing effect on world policies, economics, conflict and peace, and diplomacy. He will draw comparisons (which he already does) to John F. Kennedy, Martin Luther King and Bill Clinton. And barring a shocking shift, he will be announced President of the United States later tonight.
I often hear speculation that if elected Barrack won't live to serve his term, that he will be the target of assassination attempts, that he will be weak on terrorism, that he isn't fit to lead. I guess we'll know more tomorrow morning when we awake to a new President, and a new vision for the US.
What I would expect to see in the first 6 months in office, should he in fact get elected tonight. A timeline to end "war" in Iraq. I would expect this to be a two year withdrawl, with more troops to be moved to Afghanistan (a move that should be welcomed to Canadians, and in fact could assist in smoking out Osama Bin Ladin). A major spike in the worlds economy, in 1980, Republican President Ronald Regan had a positive effect, in 1992 Democrat Bill Clinton had a similar positive influence, and in 08, the Democrat Obama will inspire similar hope and create the same results. I would also expect positive results in world diplomacy in places like Iran, and North Korea. I believe Obama will be a welcomed Diplomat, and a far cry from George Bush's cowboy ways.
So here's hoping tomorrow we wake up to a new political philosophy in the US, with many positive effects throughout the world.
What a huge symbolic step this is for the American people, and eclipses much of the major milestones in US history.
I don't get to vote in the United States, though much of my family does, and much of my family is politically divided. In Canada where I do vote, I'm not loyal to one political party, and can't call myself left leaning or right wing, I'm pretty much middle of the road. If there is a major issue that gets to me, I vote that way. I pay very close attention to US politics and policies, and have been lucky to interview 2 First Lady's in my media career, so that helps promote my interest in South of the Border politics.
Throughout Primary season, I believed Barrack was a lot of amazing hype, with a great PR machine behind him, and lacked in issues and experience to Hillary Clinton. In the last 8 weeks of this campaign, I've seen a more well rounded Obama, and a man who is ready to step up and lead the world starting tomorrow morning. I'm now thoroughly convinced that Obama will have an amazing effect on world policies, economics, conflict and peace, and diplomacy. He will draw comparisons (which he already does) to John F. Kennedy, Martin Luther King and Bill Clinton. And barring a shocking shift, he will be announced President of the United States later tonight.
I often hear speculation that if elected Barrack won't live to serve his term, that he will be the target of assassination attempts, that he will be weak on terrorism, that he isn't fit to lead. I guess we'll know more tomorrow morning when we awake to a new President, and a new vision for the US.
What I would expect to see in the first 6 months in office, should he in fact get elected tonight. A timeline to end "war" in Iraq. I would expect this to be a two year withdrawl, with more troops to be moved to Afghanistan (a move that should be welcomed to Canadians, and in fact could assist in smoking out Osama Bin Ladin). A major spike in the worlds economy, in 1980, Republican President Ronald Regan had a positive effect, in 1992 Democrat Bill Clinton had a similar positive influence, and in 08, the Democrat Obama will inspire similar hope and create the same results. I would also expect positive results in world diplomacy in places like Iran, and North Korea. I believe Obama will be a welcomed Diplomat, and a far cry from George Bush's cowboy ways.
So here's hoping tomorrow we wake up to a new political philosophy in the US, with many positive effects throughout the world.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Blitz Me!
Happy Halloween! Given that this is the most commercialized non-holiday day in the Universe, most everyone expects me to write a blog where I tell some cheesy ghost story, or something weird like that. I don't really consider Halloween a worthy enough theme to write about, so therefore I've decided Fridays will be a blog day where I will answer three questions posed to me by readers of this blog. This being the first Friday of my "Blitz Me" blog, I asked three trusted friends to pose tough questions to me, which I will write about hopefully covering the entire question and not rambling on. These questions can be completely random, and I will do my best to answer them without having to do days of research, these are my honest opinions.
1. From Taiyo in Hawaii- Given the state of the World Economy, do you foresee a depression sized recession in the imminent future?
I don't see the recession going much further quite honestly. I think the worst has hit. The Worldwide economy is controlled mostly by the US, and if history is any determining pattern, we are about to see a switch in philosophy. In 1980, Jimmy Carter was marred in a huge economic mess, not all brought on by his Presidency, but none the less, couldn't shake it. Ronald Regan won the 1980 election, Americans became hopeful, and that ushered in a roaring 1980's where the economy soared. In 1992, Senior Bush, had hit the wall, and recession was looming, the economy stalled, and the best President in American history Bill Clinton took the reigns, inspired hope, and happiness and prosperity, and Americans began spending and the economy roared for something like 8 straight years until 9/11.
Today, after 8 years of incompetence from George Bush, the US economy is again in the same spot it found it self in 1980, and 1992, and if polls are any indication, Barrack Obama will bring a similar vision of hope and prosperity, and in the first 6 months of his term we will see a major economic shift. This will be the end of the recession talk by May of 2009, and will see a return to exciting, happy people throughout North America. That's my two cents.
In Canada, the 80 cent dollar, is fantastic. We export a majority of our Natural Resources for American Dollars, and making an extra 20cents on the dollar is much healthier for our economy. Oil prices falling does have a slight negative effect on our economy, however the average Canadian who is driving daily appreciates gas at a dollar per litre rather than at $1.40.
2. From Gwen in Toronto- What is your take on the dynamics of True love, why is it so hard to find?
I chuckled when I read this one, because anybody who knows me knows I'm a hopeless romantic who believes in true love, but isn't sure if it will ever exist for me. Here's my take, comparing love to something I actually know a lot about.
Love is like the foundation of a building. The feelings two people share, the attraction and the chemistry is what the foundation of that building is made of. The two individuals are the two side-walls, and the two joining walls are honesty and commitment. In between there is floors, and maybe, layers (0r floors) or load baring pillars that constitute tolerance to bad habits, like smoking, drinking, being perpetually late, an inability to let go of Ghosts from the past (that's my one halloween reference). You get the point, the love is symbolic of the building, people will walk by when the building is new and marvel at how great it looks, and how the construction fits in with the look of the area. That sort of thing. Love is real when two people can forgive anything and grow together through hardships, not drift apart in the tough times, only to come back when times are good and great.
Now, for that building to stand forever, and be a marvel of the landscape, it needs to be able to withstand natural disasters, and long term effects of weather, and depreciation. So does the relationship. In a perfect world, a true love can withstand anything. Anything at all. And in a perfect world that love gets stronger with time, not weaker. I think that is the dynamics of a perfect love story.
And that's not to say a true love can't break down for a time, every building needs a renovation. But if two people ever truly loved each other, their path will always find a way back to each other. In answering that question I thought of 3 couples in particular and if they read this as individuals they know exactly who I am talking about.
Naturally, I haven't found that love, damn it.... Still looking.
3. What was your best Halloween costume ever from Danielle in Montreal.
I dressed up as a stripper one year for a boyfriend, it was a private party of two, and it was a pretty simple costume, I just had to put on some clothes that were real easy to take off. He loved it, and it took me all of a half an hour to put together. I probably got costume of the year in his eyes, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Feel free to post your questions in my comment section or e-mail them directly to me at irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca.
Thanks for reading. Hope my opinions help.
1. From Taiyo in Hawaii- Given the state of the World Economy, do you foresee a depression sized recession in the imminent future?
I don't see the recession going much further quite honestly. I think the worst has hit. The Worldwide economy is controlled mostly by the US, and if history is any determining pattern, we are about to see a switch in philosophy. In 1980, Jimmy Carter was marred in a huge economic mess, not all brought on by his Presidency, but none the less, couldn't shake it. Ronald Regan won the 1980 election, Americans became hopeful, and that ushered in a roaring 1980's where the economy soared. In 1992, Senior Bush, had hit the wall, and recession was looming, the economy stalled, and the best President in American history Bill Clinton took the reigns, inspired hope, and happiness and prosperity, and Americans began spending and the economy roared for something like 8 straight years until 9/11.
Today, after 8 years of incompetence from George Bush, the US economy is again in the same spot it found it self in 1980, and 1992, and if polls are any indication, Barrack Obama will bring a similar vision of hope and prosperity, and in the first 6 months of his term we will see a major economic shift. This will be the end of the recession talk by May of 2009, and will see a return to exciting, happy people throughout North America. That's my two cents.
In Canada, the 80 cent dollar, is fantastic. We export a majority of our Natural Resources for American Dollars, and making an extra 20cents on the dollar is much healthier for our economy. Oil prices falling does have a slight negative effect on our economy, however the average Canadian who is driving daily appreciates gas at a dollar per litre rather than at $1.40.
2. From Gwen in Toronto- What is your take on the dynamics of True love, why is it so hard to find?
I chuckled when I read this one, because anybody who knows me knows I'm a hopeless romantic who believes in true love, but isn't sure if it will ever exist for me. Here's my take, comparing love to something I actually know a lot about.
Love is like the foundation of a building. The feelings two people share, the attraction and the chemistry is what the foundation of that building is made of. The two individuals are the two side-walls, and the two joining walls are honesty and commitment. In between there is floors, and maybe, layers (0r floors) or load baring pillars that constitute tolerance to bad habits, like smoking, drinking, being perpetually late, an inability to let go of Ghosts from the past (that's my one halloween reference). You get the point, the love is symbolic of the building, people will walk by when the building is new and marvel at how great it looks, and how the construction fits in with the look of the area. That sort of thing. Love is real when two people can forgive anything and grow together through hardships, not drift apart in the tough times, only to come back when times are good and great.
Now, for that building to stand forever, and be a marvel of the landscape, it needs to be able to withstand natural disasters, and long term effects of weather, and depreciation. So does the relationship. In a perfect world, a true love can withstand anything. Anything at all. And in a perfect world that love gets stronger with time, not weaker. I think that is the dynamics of a perfect love story.
And that's not to say a true love can't break down for a time, every building needs a renovation. But if two people ever truly loved each other, their path will always find a way back to each other. In answering that question I thought of 3 couples in particular and if they read this as individuals they know exactly who I am talking about.
Naturally, I haven't found that love, damn it.... Still looking.
3. What was your best Halloween costume ever from Danielle in Montreal.
I dressed up as a stripper one year for a boyfriend, it was a private party of two, and it was a pretty simple costume, I just had to put on some clothes that were real easy to take off. He loved it, and it took me all of a half an hour to put together. I probably got costume of the year in his eyes, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Feel free to post your questions in my comment section or e-mail them directly to me at irenedellaveres@yahoo.ca.
Thanks for reading. Hope my opinions help.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
A Real Headache
I had originally planned to write a blog about Re-inventing Yourself, inspired by Liberal Leader Stephane Dion's recent resignation, however, something major has changed in my life, and I wanted to blog about that instead, and will revisit the redefining of a personality.
One of my favorite people in the world is my buddy from out West. I've know him for almost one calender year, and in that time, I've always looked forward to his next e-mail, phone call or visit. He's one of a kind. He's got more personality than I have ever seen. He's as funny as the best stand-up comedian. His life and stories are like the greatest movies I've ever seen, and his attention to detail has proven accurate time and time again and takes me right to the moment that he lived. To boot, he's apparently single, and is nothing short of hot. This guy is in Winnipeg in case you wanted to know! Oh I forgot to mention, he's sincere, honest to a fault, and a handsome devil, and he carries it with unparalleled charisma. He's the catch of all catches, the guy you consider yourself lucky to have as a friend, and he cherishes his family. And who would have guessed he suffers from brain-damage?
You wouldn't know it to talk to him, he's got no visible signs at all, and short of regular migraine headaches which incapacitate him, he really has only limited symptoms. Sometimes he'll lose focus of the subject he's talking about mid-sentence, or he'll forget something that he remembers 10 seconds later, or he'll get dizzy and need to sit down for a minute. But beyond those simple symptoms, you can't tell at all that my friend is suffering from Post Concussion Syndrome, and it's not something he likes to talk about at this point, because he considers it a disability.
Obviously my friend is a proud person. And while he was first told of PCS in 2002, after believing he had suffered numerous concussions playing high school sports, and wrestling pro-style (similar to WWE, but more like minor league), which was a high risk activity given his concussion history. The guy lived in denial until recently befriending a nurse, who after seeing the effects these serious migraines accompanied my friend to the doctor and pushed for the doctor to refer my buddy to a Neurologist, and got him a CT Scan. The results were astounding, and shocking that a man who is in his late 20's now suffers from the term "Brain Damage". And I began researching Post Concussion Syndrome, and Brain Injuries in general.
Now the part that scares me the most. 2 months ago, my friend was in a car accident, where he rear-ended the car in front of him. Since that day, and until the day that the Neurologist confirmed that he suffered from Post Concussion Syndrome, and on what seemed to be a daily basis, my friend complained of "stress headaches". I can only imagine what it must feel like to go through day in and day out with a migraine headache, one that slows you down, and makes you tired. One that takes your mind off of the important focuses, such as daily tasks. And yet, like a trooper my friend persevered and performed better than ever. All the while going through a stressful personal crisis, that he's handled with pure strength, and not let it get him down.
To further complicate things, Friday in the early AM hours he was in a vehicle that was in yet another car accident. Going only 55kms per hour, the car hit a boulevard on a bridge on the front right side of the car, causing the passenger, my buddy, to suffer from a sore neck and headache for the last couple of days. To say that this is the scariest situation I've ever seen my friend in is a complete understatement. And makes me thankful for all that I have including having him in my life, something I have come to depend on regularly for friendly advice, or pep talks, inspiration and motivation.
Shockingly, and I guess luckily, my friend still has all the faculties that made him who he is. He's still got the charisma, charm and sense of humour. He still looks amazing, he still can have the most intelligent of conversations with anyone from Politicians, to bankers, to bosses, to friendsm to children. My friend is the most fortunate person in the world, and I hope he embraces his good fortune and focuses on living life safer, and relishing the gifts god has blessed him with.
So what can my good friend expect in the future? Regular headaches, short term memory gaps (where things will not come to his mind quickly, but not affect his long-term memory, he will temporarily lose things in his head). He can't push himself as hard as he'd like in the gym, he has to manage his stress better. He will take high dosage pain medication when the headaches are unbearable. He will need to ensure that he limits his risk for future head injuries, as Post Concussion Syndrome is a compound affect of numerous concussions.
Will he live a normal life? Yeah that's a complete likely hood. Thank God for that.
To those who have suffered from head injuries, and now have what seem to be far too regular headaches, it's time to consult your doctor and push him for the answers. My friend used to brush off his headaches to fatigue, or caffeine with drawl, or stress. And all the while he was suffering from actual brain damage.
The irony of the whole thing, is through his charitable efforts in Winnipeg, my friend has volunteered on numerous occasions to help Manitoba Brain Injury Association. He's good that way.
One of my favorite people in the world is my buddy from out West. I've know him for almost one calender year, and in that time, I've always looked forward to his next e-mail, phone call or visit. He's one of a kind. He's got more personality than I have ever seen. He's as funny as the best stand-up comedian. His life and stories are like the greatest movies I've ever seen, and his attention to detail has proven accurate time and time again and takes me right to the moment that he lived. To boot, he's apparently single, and is nothing short of hot. This guy is in Winnipeg in case you wanted to know! Oh I forgot to mention, he's sincere, honest to a fault, and a handsome devil, and he carries it with unparalleled charisma. He's the catch of all catches, the guy you consider yourself lucky to have as a friend, and he cherishes his family. And who would have guessed he suffers from brain-damage?
You wouldn't know it to talk to him, he's got no visible signs at all, and short of regular migraine headaches which incapacitate him, he really has only limited symptoms. Sometimes he'll lose focus of the subject he's talking about mid-sentence, or he'll forget something that he remembers 10 seconds later, or he'll get dizzy and need to sit down for a minute. But beyond those simple symptoms, you can't tell at all that my friend is suffering from Post Concussion Syndrome, and it's not something he likes to talk about at this point, because he considers it a disability.
Obviously my friend is a proud person. And while he was first told of PCS in 2002, after believing he had suffered numerous concussions playing high school sports, and wrestling pro-style (similar to WWE, but more like minor league), which was a high risk activity given his concussion history. The guy lived in denial until recently befriending a nurse, who after seeing the effects these serious migraines accompanied my friend to the doctor and pushed for the doctor to refer my buddy to a Neurologist, and got him a CT Scan. The results were astounding, and shocking that a man who is in his late 20's now suffers from the term "Brain Damage". And I began researching Post Concussion Syndrome, and Brain Injuries in general.
Now the part that scares me the most. 2 months ago, my friend was in a car accident, where he rear-ended the car in front of him. Since that day, and until the day that the Neurologist confirmed that he suffered from Post Concussion Syndrome, and on what seemed to be a daily basis, my friend complained of "stress headaches". I can only imagine what it must feel like to go through day in and day out with a migraine headache, one that slows you down, and makes you tired. One that takes your mind off of the important focuses, such as daily tasks. And yet, like a trooper my friend persevered and performed better than ever. All the while going through a stressful personal crisis, that he's handled with pure strength, and not let it get him down.
To further complicate things, Friday in the early AM hours he was in a vehicle that was in yet another car accident. Going only 55kms per hour, the car hit a boulevard on a bridge on the front right side of the car, causing the passenger, my buddy, to suffer from a sore neck and headache for the last couple of days. To say that this is the scariest situation I've ever seen my friend in is a complete understatement. And makes me thankful for all that I have including having him in my life, something I have come to depend on regularly for friendly advice, or pep talks, inspiration and motivation.
Shockingly, and I guess luckily, my friend still has all the faculties that made him who he is. He's still got the charisma, charm and sense of humour. He still looks amazing, he still can have the most intelligent of conversations with anyone from Politicians, to bankers, to bosses, to friendsm to children. My friend is the most fortunate person in the world, and I hope he embraces his good fortune and focuses on living life safer, and relishing the gifts god has blessed him with.
So what can my good friend expect in the future? Regular headaches, short term memory gaps (where things will not come to his mind quickly, but not affect his long-term memory, he will temporarily lose things in his head). He can't push himself as hard as he'd like in the gym, he has to manage his stress better. He will take high dosage pain medication when the headaches are unbearable. He will need to ensure that he limits his risk for future head injuries, as Post Concussion Syndrome is a compound affect of numerous concussions.
Will he live a normal life? Yeah that's a complete likely hood. Thank God for that.
To those who have suffered from head injuries, and now have what seem to be far too regular headaches, it's time to consult your doctor and push him for the answers. My friend used to brush off his headaches to fatigue, or caffeine with drawl, or stress. And all the while he was suffering from actual brain damage.
The irony of the whole thing, is through his charitable efforts in Winnipeg, my friend has volunteered on numerous occasions to help Manitoba Brain Injury Association. He's good that way.
Monday, October 13, 2008
First Ever Blog
I realise that there is a good chance that not too many people will actually read my blog, because it's not like I have anything worth while to say in most people's lives, but if a couple of good friends read this blog and get something from it, it will be well worth my time. And if not, I still will enjoy writing every word.
Mistakes are something everybody makes in life. Some of them are driving mistakes, some of them are mental mistakes, some of them are mistakes where we take the wrong path in life, and we look back and say if we'd only gone left instead of right, life would be so much different.
I think most of those mistakes in one's paths come from not knowing what you've got when you have it, and realizing it when it's long gone. "The Grass is Always Greener" right? Not always. When I resigned from my job a month or so ago, I left believing that my plan to see the world was inspired and going to be the time of my life. And it still may in fact be, but for the first time in my life, I'm close to wimping out, because I find myself a minor bit overwhelmed at the thought. Everything in my life is changing, and that's uncharacteristic of who I am.
I think another major mistake people make is when they end a friendship, or a relationship, or allow a rift to take away a connection with a family member. When any of this happens, it has to be done for the right reasons, and not the wrong. I am a believer that I can forgive and forget anything and become a stronger friend, sister or lover for having embraced forgiveness. And realize, the good always outweighs the bad that someone can do or has done. If you only remember the bad, you'll always be consumed with the negatives, but when you remember the greatness in somebody that was supposed to be amazing in your life at some-point, you should have no problem living life happy. And you'll never resent a moment of your life, and when you run into someone who's drifted from your life, it will be a hug and a pleasant feeling, as opposed to an uneasy stressful feeling.
Why such a depressing topic? No worries, I'm not depressed or sad or anything. I'm just really reflective of my world today, and want people to think about what amounts to mistakes in their life. One of my closest friends in the world, proves to be accountable everyday, because he's in touch with his mistakes. He reminds himself of the mistake and uses it to learn from. And he's one of the most reasonable people I know. He's also one of the most intelligent, charming, articulate and funny people I know. He's an all-around great person.
I don't want people to overly dwell on their mistakes though. Being conscious of what they are, and knowing what it takes to correct them if they so choose to, is more than enough. I believe this is a key to living a healthy, and productive lifestyle. And that's just my two cents.
So on a day where we're all supposed to be thankful for something, I'm thankful that I see the mistakes I've been making, and now I've got some correcting to do.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Mistakes are something everybody makes in life. Some of them are driving mistakes, some of them are mental mistakes, some of them are mistakes where we take the wrong path in life, and we look back and say if we'd only gone left instead of right, life would be so much different.
I think most of those mistakes in one's paths come from not knowing what you've got when you have it, and realizing it when it's long gone. "The Grass is Always Greener" right? Not always. When I resigned from my job a month or so ago, I left believing that my plan to see the world was inspired and going to be the time of my life. And it still may in fact be, but for the first time in my life, I'm close to wimping out, because I find myself a minor bit overwhelmed at the thought. Everything in my life is changing, and that's uncharacteristic of who I am.
I think another major mistake people make is when they end a friendship, or a relationship, or allow a rift to take away a connection with a family member. When any of this happens, it has to be done for the right reasons, and not the wrong. I am a believer that I can forgive and forget anything and become a stronger friend, sister or lover for having embraced forgiveness. And realize, the good always outweighs the bad that someone can do or has done. If you only remember the bad, you'll always be consumed with the negatives, but when you remember the greatness in somebody that was supposed to be amazing in your life at some-point, you should have no problem living life happy. And you'll never resent a moment of your life, and when you run into someone who's drifted from your life, it will be a hug and a pleasant feeling, as opposed to an uneasy stressful feeling.
Why such a depressing topic? No worries, I'm not depressed or sad or anything. I'm just really reflective of my world today, and want people to think about what amounts to mistakes in their life. One of my closest friends in the world, proves to be accountable everyday, because he's in touch with his mistakes. He reminds himself of the mistake and uses it to learn from. And he's one of the most reasonable people I know. He's also one of the most intelligent, charming, articulate and funny people I know. He's an all-around great person.
I don't want people to overly dwell on their mistakes though. Being conscious of what they are, and knowing what it takes to correct them if they so choose to, is more than enough. I believe this is a key to living a healthy, and productive lifestyle. And that's just my two cents.
So on a day where we're all supposed to be thankful for something, I'm thankful that I see the mistakes I've been making, and now I've got some correcting to do.
Happy Thanksgiving!
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